“We hardly ever fight. Do we really need couples counselling?”
Need? Maybe not. Build a strong foundation to prevent a need from occurring? Definitely. Why wait until enlisting the help of a professional is an absolute need. I hear from many couples, “this is our last hope”. Couples counselling is not only for couples in dire need. Why wait and agonize when you don’t have to? Building a strong, teamwork oriented foundation in your relationship can be crucial to the health of your relationship long-term.
A long-term, committed relationship goes through many phases of growth and change. Each phase means a shift for each partner while adjustment to the new way of being in that phase occurs. Often events like moving in together, marriage, children, financial change, grief or loss, job change, family stressors and many other foreseen or unforeseen events can launch a couple into a new phase. These shifts are bound to happen at least a few of times in a relationship and working on building a strong foundation together to help navigate these inevitable shifts and challenges can be the difference between working together to manage these changes or working against each other, and causing hurt in the relationship, while enduring the stress of these changes.
Building a strong foundation in counselling can include:
Learning how your partner and yourself respond to stress and what each person’s needs are during times of stress.
Learning how your partner and yourself like to feel appreciated and loved by the other.
Learning how to disagree and resolve problems in a healthy way.
Learning how to be an effective communicator with your partner, including sharing feelings and needs and listening and responding to feelings and needs in a helpful and productive way.
Learning how to make time each day to nurture the relationship and give it the attention it needs to stay healthy and to even grow.
Couples counselling is not only for couples feeling like therapy is their last hope. Many healthy couples use counselling to grow stronger together, so they don’t ever need to experience the fear of hopelessness in their relationship.